Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
