It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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