ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
Randomize