do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Is it penis luge time yet?
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
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