Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
