I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Randomize
