any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize