The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
