If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Randomize
