he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
did you just send me my own nude
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.