is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
25 Women On How They Let Their Oblivious Partners Know They Want To Bone
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Randomize
