making cat noises will not fix the situation.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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