ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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