Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
