so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Randomize
