we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Randomize