all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
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