his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
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