I heard we made out
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
