Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
