smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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