those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
