a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
