That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
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