What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
Randomize