i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
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