i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
