How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
My ass is underappreciated
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
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