She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Randomize