A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
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