I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
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He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
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I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
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