Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Randomize
