I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
Found your dick twin last night
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
Randomize