Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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