I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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