dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize
