We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
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I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
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