what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
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