We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Randomize
