Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Randomize