It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
