What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
You were trust falling into bushes
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
