I molested 6 butterflies tonight
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Randomize
