What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
