Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
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