I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
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