***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
