sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize