Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
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