at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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