She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
If that was your dad, he is hot
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
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